I'll take life, hold the babies

By: Brittany Lane

Posted: 2/5/07

Time really flies by, except when visiting the Department of Motor Vehicles.

I sat in an uncomfortable chair at the DMV for about an hour last week, waiting to get a lost driver's license replaced.

As I sat there twiddling my thumbs going through my mental to-do list, I was approached by a very pregnant young woman who asked me if I remembered her. My terrible memory ensured I didn't. She explained we went to elementary school together. I remember the young woman now because she was the most popular girl in fifth grade. We exchanged pleasantries and parted ways, but the fact that this former schoolmate was about to pop stuck in my head.

The encounter at the DMV reinforced my decision to hold off having kids. My former classmate was the same age as me, and 21 is too young to have a child.

I know so many teenagers and young women who had children at young ages. My mother turned 18 four days after she had me. It was difficult for her to take care of me and later my little sister, even with help. Almost every woman in my extended family had children before turning 25.

During my last two years of high school, girls were winding up pregnant left and right. I was afraid to drink from the water fountain.

Several of my friends had baby showers before they had 21st-birthday parties. Three of my cousins had children before they turned 20. The list goes on and on.

Women in their twenties are still the majority of women having children, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. 2005 Census data reports non-marital child births occur more frequently among teenage women than any other age demographic. Women with low incomes or whose highest levels of education completed are high school or an associate's degree have the most children.

My teenage cousin's daughter is a very cute handful. I'm proud my cousin is taking care of her responsibility, but I can't help but feel disappointed. Having a child while still in high school has limited her opportunities. She still can be successful, but it will now be so much more difficult.

There is a trend in women waiting to become mothers later in life. Instead of getting married in their twenties and having babies right out of high school, many women are postponing motherhood until age 30 or later. Between 2002 and 2003, birth rates for women ages 30-34 increased four percent. Birth rates for women ages 40-44 increased by 5 percent.

I'm all for postponing motherhood at least beyond age 25. Having children in your twenties or earlier seems like too much, too fast. I'm still figuring out who I am and where I'm going in life. I'd like to focus on a career, become financially stable, and travel the world. All these things become more difficult when kids enter the picture.

I applaud those young mothers who are raising children while going to college or working. I don't know how these women do it. As for me, babies are cute and all, but I won't be having one anytime soon.

blane@unews.com